Make It Count

Here comes the sun.

Follow your dream.  

Sing a song.

Ride a bike.

Play ball.

Stick your toes in the sand. 

Call a friend. 

Make your weekend count!

Not My Finest Hour

Yesterday at work was not my best moment.  Some of my co-workers witnessed my bad behavior and especially one, who was the brunt of it.

Maybe you have experienced this too?

It's like everything inside me is screaming "STOP" and I just stick my fingers in my ears and charge ahead, exactly like a bull in a china closet, wrecking everything in sight.  First, hurting someone that is attempting to help me and second, hurting those around who I hope will be my friends.  I am heartbroken that I did not handle myself better. Why do these things happen?  Why do I let the frustration win out over personal relationships?

Have you ever felt this way?

It was one of "those" days.

As I wept over the mess I had made, the following words of a song came to me.  Maybe you will like the words too.

Somehow I Know 

by Tim Sheppard

I failed You once again.

I promised that I wouldn’t Lord.

How can I be your friend,

When all I seem to do is hurt
 the ones I love the most?

I wake up in the night,

Trying to find the words 
to make the wrongs all into right.

How can I ask forgiveness?

Still somehow You let me know.

You’ll never let me go.

You love me.

You love me.

Somehow I know.

Somehow You care.

Somehow I know.

Somehow You’ll always be there.

Somehow I know.

Somehow You love me.

Wow, I just cannot understand it, but He loves us even when....despite everything....It is so hard to comprehend.  I make the same mistakes over and over and yet, God is always there, hearing my cries for forgiveness and making a way to be new again.            

There is a verse in the Bible that says "His mercies are new every morning."  Sometimes I wonder if He knew there would be me, Real Gurl, needing new mercies every hour!  Real Gurl:  Real and authentic, not fake and full of misspellings, failures, and messes.  Yep! I am a mess. 

I have apologized to those I know I hurt.  Several have already been very gracious to respond with kindness, loving, forgiving.....allowing me to begin again.  I am grateful.

I will try again, starting right now.

Every Day a Friday

Erma Bombeck is one of my favorite authors.  Sadly, she is no longer with us after a battle with cancer, but her books still linger in me.  She wrote, "If Life is a Bowl of Cherries, What Am I Doing in the Pits?" and other such lovely, funny books about motherhood and it's craziness.  It was life before pantyhose and microwaves that defrost and she made it hilarious!

In one book, Erma wrote a story about being in church with her husband and three children.  Everyone wearing their starched best and displaying their best manners and showing the appropriate amount of reverence.  Then the baby on the third pew decides to look over her mother's shoulder and coo and laugh at the crowd behind her!  What a cutie! Of course, some of the parishioners looked dismayed.  Misbehavior!  In church!  Where God is!  

But Erma said something I will never forget.

She said, and I am free-wheeling with her words here:  

"Babies don't schedule happiness. They haven't learned yet that happiness must last a lifetime and therefore must be conserved."

You know you are feeling it....the anticipation of Friday. We save our best selves for Friday.  We feel chipper on Friday.  Friday gets special attention. We tend to be more jovial and friendly with others.  We aren't easily kerfuffled and we are more forgiving on this glorious day of the week.  In fact, there is a kind of heroic feel to Friday....like we can do anything and we are above the fray and we are free.

BONUS:  This particular weekend is not only Friday, but it is a three-day weekend and at my place of employment, it is also payday.  This is like the Trifecta of Perfect Fridays. Add blue jeans and BAM!

I was just wondering.....

How would it change life if you approached every single day like it was Friday?

It is worthy of introspection.  Why do we save our best attitudes, our forgiving spirits, our plans for fun, until that one day of the week?  Do we really have to make an appointment on our calendar for this, or can we live that way daily?  Happiness scheduled for June 2, 2016 from 4-5p.m.  It sounds silly but we all do it.  We constantly put off things and people that are important to us.  Like the story about the baby in church, we live as if we have a limited amount of happiness allotted to us.  Good news!  Happiness is unlimited!

It's just a thought but those other six days of the week have value too.  We don't have to wait.  And if we string enough of those days together, we just might make a life worth living!

Wanted: Gooey, Chewy Brownies

Quite often, too often, I go back.  I go back to the ground-zero moment in my life and I am grateful for the view.

That's one thing about time....it does bring perspective.  The saying goes that time heals but I don't believe that is true.  I think time gives us space to grow, learn, and come to understand the past better than when we are at the point of impact and emotionally charged.  That is what has happened for me.  The extreme pain of those moments have lessened and I can admire that I made it through.  It means a lot to me to be able to enumerate the valuable lessons and miracles that I have experienced.  I treasure how those experiences continue to help me live at peace with life.

Positive > Negative

Focus on Building the New

After a long visit with a friend I had not seen in a while, there was great cause for reflection this weekend.  My friend is really going through tough times and I don't envy the load she is carrying.  I can only be there when needed to let her speak her truth and try to infuse some sort of hope into the dire circumstances.

Whenever we are in a tough spot, most people have plans to change.  Most have a desire to live differently and can even envision what that would look like.  However, most people get stuck because they never start!

Wild Woman Rides Again

Peanuts demonstrate peaceful life.

Well....so much for my attempt at a peaceful life.  My response in the midst of rude, critical, argumentative people was less than stellar.  It only took a matter of days after posting the above Peanuts cartoon, when I was challenged to keep the peace.  I failed miserably. 

Change is Living

Focus on Building the New

After a long visit with a friend I had not seen in a while, there was great cause for reflection this weekend.  My friend is really going through tough times and I don't envy the load she is carrying.  I can only be there when needed to let her speak her truth and try to infuse some sort of hope into the dire circumstances.

Whenever we are in a tough spot, most people have plans to change.  Most have a desire to live differently and can even envision what that would look like.  However, most people get stuck because they never start!

Real Gurl Life: Courage Required

In the past several weeks I have been caught in a deluge of soul-searching, questioning every aspect of my life and saying "why" a lot!  A recent weekend at the beach where the questioning all began has brought a new perspective.

At the beach, on a bench all alone, unhappy and sad, (two different things) and asking God what could I do different....what could I change.....when it became immediately clear.  The Voice said, "you've got to shake things up.  You have to do something you have never done before."