Far too often I am swayed by others on how I should see myself. For some reason, Brain thinks it knows EVERYTHING others are thinking, seeing, feeling, and believing. Then, it dictates to me and I believe every single word.
If you are like me, then you have a difficult time seeing when you are being impacted by others' opinions. We do it so often that, sadly, it has become second nature to be untrue to the Real Gurl who lives inside. Sometimes it seems we willingly take on this heavy cloak that is only filled with a desperation to be accepted. I will admit, approval is my middle name and this happens to me far too often. I, for one, am sick of it.
Just yesterday I was having a conversation with a couple of friends after work, sharing my hopes for a business start-up. There was lots of energy, enthusiasm, ideas, and excitement and then someone let Brain take the wheel. In fact, Brain went into overdrive.
Well....just who do YOU think you are to believe you could do THAT?
Why do you think that would even work?
What makes you think YOU have anything to offer?
You'd be crazy to try it. Nothing YOU do ever works out.
What in the world would your family think?
You are not being very responsible with your life choices.
The quote above from Dr. Phil, a personal favorite, says don't be defined by others perception of you. Let's look at the simple definition of those words here below:
define: means to state or describe exactly the nature, scope, or meaning of.
perceive: means to interpret or look on (someone or something) in a particular way.
Do you want someone else's interpretation of you to become your life statement?
I don't WANT to be what Brain or anyone else decides I am. I have never liked trying to fit in. It always seemed so difficult and never seemed to work out, but I sure did try.
As a young girl of 13 years, I admired our pastor's daughter, who was 18. I began trying to act just like her in every way. I tried to speak like her, hold my lips like her, stood tall and proper like her. I held my head erect, almost snobbish and talked with a thick, froggy-type voice, thinking I sounded so grownup. Rather quickly, my mother noticed my efforts and asked me if I was trying to be like "Suzy." Apparently it was pretty obvious that I wasn't being myself.
So it is when we try to imitate others. It is obvious to everyone else. Have no doubt. It comes across phony and fake.
Let me encourage you to be yourself. Just you. There is only one you. If anyone is going to play that part, you are the one! No one else will do it right. Being a real you is satisfying, fulfilling, comfortable, and much easier than all that pretending.
Don't think you know who you are? Do not worry. It is a life-long walk and it really just takes being on the lookout for when you feel most happy, most fulfilled, most satisfied with life.
Next time you hear that negative voice questioning your ideas, abilities, or anything new, try asking yourself these questions instead:
What if it actually worked?
I will try. I can do it.
I am not special. Just being me.
It just might work out.
This is what I want.
I can live with my choices.
A Real Gurl Life awaits.